How to learn to hate wine

Happy holidays! 'Tis the season of holiday parties, friends, family, gift-giving, etc.

'Tis the season to imbibe.

This past weekend, I visited Asheville, NC for my birthday! While in Asheville, I went to a wine tasting at the Biltmore Estate.

Jess! You hate wine! It makes you dry heave to smell it! People pour you a glass with dinner and you rudely turn it down! Why did you go to a wine tasting?

Good questions. And a better answer: it was free with our fancy schmancy Candlelight Christmas tickets. And I never say no to free.

So we embarked on the tour, learned all about the grapes and fermentation and how to make the bubbly. And it was really really neat and educational. I love educational... and then came the tasting.

First, let me digress and tell you about my history of wine drinking.

1. Freshman year: my roommate and I bought a bottle of Merlot. It tasted nasty with our Olive Garden take out... but delicious with the vending machine cookies we ate for dessert. I had a wicked hangover.

2. Sophomore year: to celebrate our first apartment, my roommate and I bought a big bottle of Riesling. We drank too much, too fast, and danced to Miley Cyrus. I had a wicked hangover.

3. Discovery of Arbor Mist and, my personal fave, Andre: Oh, peach-flavored Andre. Oh, you. You don't even taste remotely wine or champ-like. A beautiful thing, you are.

4. Mistaking liking Andre for liking Champagn: Champ and Andre are NOT THE SAME. Champ is not nearly as delicious. Even if you put fruit in it. Or juice. Sigh.

5. Trying to learn to like wine: This happened this summer. I decided once and for all it was time to get over my vino-aversion, and start choosing wine over beer (because beer makes me farty, ok?) I wimped out. After 1 sip. I still prefer beer.

Which brings me to the wine tasting. I was handed a list and told I could have as much as I'd like. My first thought was, I wish this was beer. But then I decided to suck it up and taste some and get over it.

And you know what? It wasn't half bad. I even found a couple I really enjoyed. Yes they were white wines, yes they were sweet and fruity, so what? I bought a bottle, it's Christmas Wine. It's delicious.

Bottom line: don't try to like something by overindulging, especially with alcohol. And drink good wine. And remember Tums when you're drinking beer.

Me, in front of the Bass Pond at Biltmore.